Inspiration and Shame in Blogging

Inspiration is a big part of posting.  This blog wasn't meant for a purpose - it was to enable me to help speak.  I've decided to forget about some of the stale posts that have been sitting around for a week.  If they never get finished, big deal.  At the time I initially created them, I had the inspiration to transmute feelings into words, but once that inspiration fades, there is little impetus to continue a stale thought.  Thus, the post hangs on in the background, a constant reminder of what I wanted to do but didn't do.

I wrote the above yesterday night, trying to understand why I had stopped blogging.  Although there is truth in it, I realized tonight during yoga that the major reason why I had stopped blogging was the shame.  Self-expectations with regards to how much and how often I would post... with respect to what I would accomplish, what wonders I would create... and then a failure to meet those expectations and the accompanying shame.  That is the crippling reason why I stopped posting - why I started avoiding posting, even.

I release myself from any expectation on how often I will post, or on what quality or kind of posts I shall create.  Rather, this is just a place for me to write my thoughts, share my soul, drip my blood.

Additionally, I may practice self-love in the form of appreciating, nay lauding my accomplishments, and accepting my limits.  It's normal and natural and even expected to want to accomplish things and not reach them.  Take joy in what you have done, and internalize that I am enough.  I have enough... I have accomplished enough.  I love.